A few weeks at home away from the madness of university life, has really made me reflect on just how much I’ve changed in the past two years and looking back, how incredibly fast these three years are passing by.
Thinking back to how I used to be is slightly embarrassing. I can’t actually ever remember being excited or nervous for university and my new adventure. I think at that point in my life I was quite comfortable living the life I did.
Fast forward to August 2016, a month before my move to Nottingham, I decided I wasn’t going to go and study a course doing something that I’ve loved doing for years. Because of a boy. A BOY!
It is comical and embarrassing to write those words down. I think anyone who knows me, knows I am far from that girl now. It’s hard for me to believe now that I would have ever stopped my own progress for someone else. Because quite frankly, my own goals and life experience is what is most important to me now two years on.
But, when I grew some balls and went to Nottingham, I knew it was the best decision I could have made. From the word go I was so lucky. I lived for a year with people who became my best friends and put up with me when I was being weird or when I was being my mardy self.
We had some crazy times, drinking all the time, meeting new people. Doing many things I now slightly regret. But that’s character building, right?
I had what I thought was the best year and that second year couldn’t be as crazy, but I was wrong. Looking back on the past 8 months, I have had some strange, crazy, mental experiences, that I can’t always put into words. But I’ve had the best year.
At the start of second year, I told myself to push myself out of the comfortable zone I was now in at university and do more things. I decided to join NTU Tramps (Trampoline society) in October and though I was shy and nervous at first (and never turned up to training), I ended up gaining so many great friends.
For the last two years, I have been so lucky to spend my time with incredible friends, study a course that I love and even gain a new job with people who are now some of my best friends.
But reflecting on those two years, I am actually so proud of myself and how much I have grown as a person. I’ve become more confident in myself, doing Trent TV and presenting a radio show with by beautiful friend Yasmin, has proven to myself that I should stop comparing myself to others on my course, we are all learning.
I’d say that I have always been a social person, but this year I decided to branch out from my house mates and course mates (not that there’s anything wrong with them) and meet more new people, as that’s what university is about. And I’ve never been happier.
I met people this year who I can be my true, partially disgusting, weird self around and they accepted me for who I am, after only knowing me a short week.But, the part of me that has changed the most *queue soppy paragraph ahead*, is how I view myself.
For a long time, I always compared myself to other people. They’re prettier than me, they’re skinnier than me. But, what does that matter? There is always going to be someone better than you in different ways, and they’ll always be people you are better than.
But why does life have to be a competition? Being happy with who I am, and not having the thoughts of “what will people think?”, “what will people say about me?”, is the best feeling ever. Because being happy because you are you is such a nice way to live.
I am so content where I am right now in my life. I don’t know what the far or near future holds, but right now I’m very grateful to just live in the present. I NEVER want these moments to come to and end, and it breaks my heart that I only have one more year left at Trent. The people, places and experiences I’ve gained have helped me become a better person. Trent has my heart forever.