Before you begin reading this post- do you think the stated title is correct? Does being cheated on make a person ruin every other relationship they may have with someone or make them too scared to be in another relationship, because of the affects of being cheated on?
I know I can speak for a lot of people, when I say finding out someone is unfaithful to you sucks and literally rips you apart. But should one persons stupid and disgusting acts cause you from having a happy relationship with someone else?
It’s true that the hurt you feel will carry on your shoulders for a long, long time. But what happens when you get over the said relationship? Do you get over the betrayal too?
From my point of view, I believe you will always be cautious of someone leaving you for someone else once it happens to you. When you know you could have something great, it will always hover in the back of your mind how long the happiness will last before they find someone else.
Unfortunately for me, it’s happened one too many times, that I’ve now subconsciously stopped myself from having any sort of emotion towards boys in my life.
Although if it had only been the first boy in my life who’d be unfaithful, I think I would by now be fully trusting in (most) men. When I (finally) got over the hurt and betrayal the relationship, I truly think I got over the betrayal.
It didn’t matter to me that he went off with someone else, because I realised that where I was going in life was a much higher point then both of them. And quite frankly, I hope they’re both stuck in that silly life for ever. If I look at that person now, all I feel is great fullness that he was removed from my life, for good.
But, when I then again started dating people, they all turned out to be the same arse hole the first one was. So, maybe now every boy I meet I hold a massive wall up, because at this age every boy seems to just want to get every girl they can, rather than make one person happy.
With all that said, if a boy genuinely made me happy again, I don’t think it would be correct to carry all the hurt someone else caused into that new relationship. They didn’t hurt you. They didn’t cheat on you. And they might not be just another arse.
My advice to anyone who has been cheated on in the past, is to not transfer the pain and anger towards that situation into a new life with someone. Leave those emotions with the person that caused them. Because it might end up that you are the only one preventing yourself from being happy with someone again.